“Embrace”

Ahhhh… Embrace.   One of my favorites on the album due to the depth and complexity of the song (which is all very intentional).   
I ended up creating over 15 unique versions of this song before settling down with this album edit.
All the other versions had different takes on the production of the music, but the vocals remained very similar across all.  Some were more EDM styled, some more poppy, and 1 version almost got sold to the Pet Shop Boys via working with Markus Schulz!   (I still think their vocals would have sounded pretty rad on the track)
The reason for all these versions was that I couldn’t sign off on the track until I felt it was just right, because this song in particular was very special to me due to its deep meaning.

Bluntly put, the song is about my love, fear, respect, and awe of science, and my ever evolving relationship with it.    

The song starts with a heartbeat kick and lush very organic sounds (representing nature), eventually peaking into a more “techno” mood with sharper sounds and tighter rhythms (representing science/technology), then going back to the more organic and deep moody sounds with the familiar heartbeat kick to ease the song to a close (back to nature).

Ive always had a deep love for science and the natural world, especially astronomy and all that fun stuff.  
I felt my understanding of the absolute vastness of everything was expanding with the more I was learning as I got older.
Seeing the “big picture” a bit clearer sounded like a good idea until my love affair started to have a dark side.

The more I learned, the more I was filled with this new inescapable dreaded feeling of realizing at the same time just how small and insignificant everything I knew, including myself, really was.
As the universe got bigger and bigger in my mind, my understanding of my place in it (or all of our places) became increasingly smaller and smaller.  

I now had this weird love/hate relationship with science.
I loved her, she absolutely stole my heart, and the more I understood about her created a deeper connection, very much like a traditional relationship.   
However, the deeper the connection also included the feeling that none of “this” really mattered.
“This” being humanity, all life on earth, our entire solar system… and yes, even me.
I felt that everything we know from the dawn of humanity is just a fragile speck on the cosmic timeline, and just as nothing related to humans existed a long time ago, a long time into the future the same will be true.

Since having this personal revelation, Ive struggled with my own feelings on the subject as part of my reality.
I still absolutely love to learn as much as I possibly can about everything related to the natural world and universe as a whole.  
But at the same time it breaks my heart to steadily feel smaller and smaller in it.   Less and less significant.   Less of an individual that will ever matter in the big picture of things. 
Just a small speck of nothing in the big cosmic timeline.

However, at least for me, I think in the end the romance is worth the heartbreak…

This is more than you and me, a breath to take away.   
This is not what it may seem, a life without a trace.  
This is more than I can take, to live without a chance.  
But in the end we’ll find ourselves, embracing this romance

Track 5: Embrace {6:37}

I’m falling endlessly, a dream within a dream,
now I’m afraid to wake.
you’re calling out to me, a face I cannot see
see how much I can take.

and just once, in my life,
I’d use this time, for what is right,
in the end I’ll try my best,
to free my mind, one last time.

and just once, in my life,
I’d use this time, for what is right,
in the end I’ll try my best,
to free my mind, one last time.

this is more than you and me, a breath to take away,
this is not what it may seem, a life without a trace,
this is more than I can take, to live without a chance,
in the end we’ll find ourselves, embracing this romance.

I hesitate to think, we’re standing on the brink,
I peer into the void,
theres nothing left to fear, Ive never felt so clear,
I feel Im overjoyed.

and just once in my life,
I’d use this time for what is right,
in the end I’ll try my best,
to free my mind one last time.

this is more than you and me, a breath to take away,
this is not what it may seem, a life without a trace,
this is more than I can take, to live without a chance,
in the end we’ll find ourselves, embracing this romance.